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Slouching towards 2017


It’s been 2017 for over two weeks, now

It’s 2017 and the Holiday Season is finally over for me. I finished taking down the Christmas tree in Charlottesville on Saturday and I’m now in Hopewell, ready to resume work on Syrena. I took a hiatus from writing in December and that has spilled over into January. There’s no escaping it. Time to get back to work.

Meanwhile, back at the Island

The holidays were relatively quiet but not uneventful on Colony Island. There were two big announcements in the Tench Household. One of them dealt with a wedding while the other dealt with a new business in town. More change is coming to Colony Island.

Meanwhile, Amy sought an escape from the feuding by going to sea for over a week and Billy King spent a quiet Christmas at home in Alexandria, VA. A far cry from his usual carousing. There are things on his mind as he boards the train for Florida and his return to work will be postponed for a day. He’s planning a detour through Royston and someone will be waiting for him at the train station.

A New Venture

There’s a new venture on the horizon. It has nothing to do with writing and everything to do with Colony Island. I plan to take my two years of high school art, as well as a college course in art history, and try my hand at jewelry making. Nothing fancy, mind you. I just want to do something with my hands besides pounding the keyboard.

I spent my working life trying to figure out how write programs that would work. I’m now trying to figure out how to write scenes that will work. I need to learn a few new tricks.

Colony Island Crafts

My plans – such as they are –  include setting up a shop on, called Colony Island Crafts, and selling a few things. If I’m lucky, I’ll earn enough to buy a new pipe every now and then. Don’t expect to have a mermaid stuck on everything, though. However, I’m planning to work a lot with shells, corals, and other natural bits.

The Back Story

Urban Mermaid mentioned that many of Penelope’s shower gifts were items of hand-made jewelry. The mermaids of Colony Island have long earned pin money by collecting shells and selling them to the tourist shops on the mainland. Some went a step further and turned the shells into necklaces, etc. which let to experimenting with sea glass and, later, conventional jewelry making materials.

As it will be mentioned in Syrena, mermaids have always searched for things to adorn themselves as well as their spouses. Edna Boatman, of Edna’s Home & Bath, can teach mainlanders a thing or two about merchandising. Using the slogan “Decorate Your Mate”, she has a glass case full of locally crafted, necklaces, bracelets, etc. for mermaids to give to their mates. Since these items are produced on the Island, she makes little – if any – profit out of the transactions and instead, uses them as a loss leader to attract shoppers.

Now, you know the rest of the story and it’s time for me to sit down and write.

Happy Holidays, 2016

Happy Holidays

Happy Holidays

Try as he might, the author has yet to find any images of mermaids and Hanukkah menorahs. Therefore, the image below will just have to do. (At least it has a ‘beach’ theme.)

Happy Hanukkah

Happy Hanukkah

Holiday Gift-Giving

Holiday Gift-Giving

It’s That Time of Year . . . Again

Thanksgiving is now history. Black Friday is but a memory and Cyber Monday will soon be in life’s rear-view mirror. We have begun the slow, inexorable march towards Christmas. At least those amongst us who celebrate Hanukkah will get a bit of a break this time as the start of the holiday won’t begin until the evening of December, 24th.

Then, there’s Old Christmas, the Winter Solstice, Saturnalia, the Feast of Mithras, and we can’t forget Boxing Day on December 26th. Let’s face it people, there is no escape and sooner or later, you’ll have to hand over a gift or two . . . or three.

Holiday Gift-Giving – Solved

Fortunately, your friends from Colony Island are here to help. For those of you with a mer-mad relative or two . . . or three . . . on your list, this is the perfect opportunity for you save yourself a bit of hassle. Why not turn them on to the mermaid novel for grown-ups that everyone’s talking about? Yes, why not give them a copy of Urban Mermaid?

If you do, your friends, relatives, postman, etc. will have a chance to cuddle up with a hot cup of tea on wintery evenings – or afternoons – and escape into the fantastic world of Colony Island. They’ll get to find out that the merfolk of this mythical town on the Florida coast have jobs, hopes, dreams and income taxes, just like the rest of us. This boy-meets-mermaid story is a tale of love against all odds.

Urban Mermaid – The Story

Penelope is facing a lonely, loveless existence, living amongst humans. Peter MacPherson is the poster boy for rejection. Ever since he discovered the wonder of girls, none of his relationships have lasted longer than four weeks.

Mermaids are strongly advised to avoid relationships with human males. Penelope is out of options and is on the verge of pulling the plug on her life. Except for his brother, Peter is alone in the world and facing a bleak, loveless future. His broken heart can only take so much abuse.

All this changes one Sunday afternoon in April, when a chance encounter and a practical joke turn into something more; an epic story of love, acceptance, and overcoming obstacles. Penelope and Peter will learn they are more alike than different. Penelope will find her anchor and Peter will arrive at his safe harbour.

This tale of tails is a sweet love story; just the thing we need in times like these.

Easy to Buy!

Urban Mermaid is available in both print and electronic formats and can be purchased by using the links in the sidebar to your right. Give those on your list – including yourself – the gift of awe, wonder, and unconditional love.

Happy Holidays and thank you for your support.

Howard Parsons – author

The perils of writing

The perils of writing Writing a novel can be a perilous business. The other day, I was minding my own business, mapping out an upcoming chapter of Syrena, the sequel to Urban Mermaid. As part of the outlining process, I quickly sketched out some dialogue which will occur between Peter MacPherson and Mrs. Gar, the widowed next door neighbour to Ilene and George Tench.

Mrs. Gar is a nice old soul of indeterminate age. She is definitely older than George and Ilene, but it’s hard to put a finger on just how old she may be. Her husband disappeared at sea decades ago, years before George and Ilene moved in. Her mate’s first name was Hector and though she will admit that he’s, in all likelihood, dead, she nonetheless keeps a candle burning in the window of her heart, hoping for his return.

What happened to Hector?

I’ve often wondered this, myself. Originally, I had planned for Ellen Gar’s mate to have been lost at sea, years before the narration starts. Not content to leave well enough alone, I kept picking at it, trying to come up with a plausible explanation.

Returning to Syrena, there is a scene, in the chapter I’m currently outlining, where Peter asks Ellen about Mr. Gar. It seems he had this tattoo of a multi-coloured sea fan on his back. Ellen had paid for the tattoo and she looked forward to waking up every morning so she could admire the artistry.

Suddenly side-tracked

Well friends, that did it. I put down the outline development I’d been working on and started contemplating exactly what happened to Hector and exactly what I am going to do about it. I can now reveal that what happened to Hector will appear as a sub-plot in book number three. I already know of a few other things happening in book number three but I’ve got to save something for later.

Keep the reader in suspense

So, there you have it. Will Mrs. Gar ever learn exactly what happened to Hector? Will Hector ever return? I have just one word for you: Madagascar.

I hope you have ( or had) a culturally appropriate Thanksgiving. Now, time to get back to that outline.

Another one bytes the dust

Chapter progress for SyrenaChapter Progress for Syrena

I finished another chapter of Syrena yesterday. Please don’t start thinking I’ve turned into some sort of writing demon who can whip out chapter after chapter. The only person I know who can do that is S.K. Munt and she lives in Australia.

When I was writing Urban Mermaid, I cranked out a chapter in a day, one or two times. That was a rare exception and I am not expecting a repeat performance. Up until recently, my writing speed was more like one chapter per season.

Another chapter bytes the dust

The secret behind the speed on this latest accomplishment is the fact that I’d already written a third of the chapter . . . Several seasons ago. I do feel like I’m picking up speed on the sequel to Urban Mermaid but don’t expect Syrena (the working title) to go to the printer’s anytime soon. I’m working on the first draft and I already have a list of revisions I’d like to make. I also need to add some descriptive language to a good number of scenes.

A Change of Topic

Changing topics, I’d like to mention a few of the underlying themes found in Syrena, as well as the rest of the series.

Aside from two people finding each other, the Colony Island series is also about people who have had a difficult time in life, getting a second chance, finding their true home, finding acceptance. One underlying theme in Syrena is that of redemption.

Billy King

Billy King is Peter MacPherson’s old college roomie. They were thrown together for their freshman year and stayed together for their entire college career. Billy is an extremely talented musician who’s a bit stuck on himself. Moreover, he’s a lady’s man and has, on many occasions, taken advantage of his musical abilities to snag bed partners.

He is a peripheral character in Urban Mermaid but plays a much larger role in Syrena. His womanizing makes him come across as more than a bit sleazy. He also has a condescending attitude towards Peter. Billy repeatedly tried to help his roommate find a steady girl in college but to no avail. This included interfering with some things Peter wanted to do.

His condescending attitude even extends to Peter’s relationship with Penelope. Billy is convinced that the whole thing is a fluke and gives them three years at the very most. He also wonders if he could snag Penelope on the rebound. The two of them both work in the city and Peter seems determined to stay in the jerkwater town of Colony Island. Syrena is about his ultimate redemption.

Can a leopard truly change his spots? You’ll have to read Syrena to find out.

Quick Notes

Quick notesHere are a few quick notes for your amusement.

Progress On Book # 2

Well, I finished another chapter. It wants polishing, of course. The chapter covers between Thanksgiving and Christmas in the plot’s time line. I would have finished it back on Friday, but issues with our septic system caused the delay.

I have a partially written chapter that I need to flesh out. This portion was written back in May, 2015, during my cruise to Bermuda and concerns Amy’s holiday excursion in the Bahamas. Things are starting to get a bit complicated for her.

There’s another chapter I have to go back and write. I pretty much know what’s in it so the process shouldn’t take very long. I hope.

Video Issues

The next item concerns the website itself. A visitor pointed out to me that the book trailer for Urban Mermaid, located on the Front Page, was not working. It seems that a parameter which once worked with the YouTube plug-in, no longer does. I have corrected this issue. If any of you tried to view it and couldn’t, now’s your chance.


I have an FAQ which will be published on either Thursday or Friday. It covers just what the residents of Colony Island look like. This should answer some questions for those of you who haven’t read the book, yet. If you haven’t, right now would be a great time to read Urban Mermaid before the holiday madness sets in,

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that Urban Mermaid makes a great holiday gift for the mer-fans in your life.

That’s all of my quick notes for now. Time for me to get back to work.

Reviews and Recommendations

Reviews and RecommendationsSome of you will know me as the author of Urban Mermaid. Others will think of me as that nutty mermaid guy. Still others will see my name and think “Didn’t I get a restraining order against him, once upon a time?”

Well, besides writing books about mermaids, I also write book reviews about mermaid novels. Over the past month or so, I’ve penned three reviews about 2 novels and one entire series. I usually post my reviews on my other blog site, The Parsons’ Rant[1], Goodreads, and Amazon.

With the holidays looming on the horizon, I thought I’d mention these books just in case you’re either looking for gift ideas or you’re trying to come up with ways to spend a bit of the holiday gelt that may come your way.  By gelt, I mean coin of the realm and not the chocolate kind, no matter how tasty they may be.

Reviews and Recommendations

Both the two books and the entire series, are intended for YA (Young Adult) readers. Even if your Young Adult years are a distant speck in life’s rear-view mirror, these stories are both fun and exciting. They’re a great way to pass the time whilst waiting for your Social Security cheque to arrive.

So, here they are:

  • Chasing Destiny by M. Schafer. The target audience is the lower end of the YA spectrum as well as middle school readers. That did not stop an old geezer like me from loving this story.
  • Skipping the Scales by Pete Tarsi. The target audience is younger YAs and above. The book is the second in Tarsi’s scales series.
  • The Awakened Fate series by Skye Malone. The series consists of five novels and one novella and is for a general YA audience though some may find it a bit intense.

Three great reads for Young Adults and those who can still remember what it’s like to be young.

And don’t forget, Urban Mermaid makes a great gift for mer-mad New Adults and above.

Coming soon. My review of C.L. Savage’s kaleidoscopic Mermaid Rising.

[1] The Parsons Rant is my general-purpose blog. There is a lot of mermaid stuff there like book reviews. It also allows me to vent my spleen about other things as well.

Happy Samhain!


Happy New Year! What’s that you say? New Year’s Eve isn’t until the end of December? Well perhaps I should say ‘Happy Samhain’.

Samhain is the Celtic New Year’s Eve. The Celts believed that the ghosts of all who had passed away during the year, would try to return home on that night. While you may have loved uncle Hamish or aunt Morag, you did not necessarily want their ghosts showing up at your house.

Fooling the Spirits of the Departed

To throw them off the trail, people would put on disguises so they wouldn’t be recognized. Some Celts would hollow out a turnip, carve a threatening face into it, and set it on the threshold of their dwelling with a lit candle inside.

Samhain Today

All this sounds pretty familiar, right? When the Church came along. it co-opted the holiday, making the first day of the Celtic New Year to be All Saints Day. The day before became All Hallows Eve and over the centuries, the name was corrupted to Halloween. Jack O’Lanterns have replaced the carved turnips and now it’s the kids who put on costumes and go door to door looking fro sweets.

So what do mermaids have in common with Halloween? Well, other than the potential for hundreds of little Ariels going from door to door that night, absolutely nothing. If anyone goes to a party dressed as Penelope or Peter, please send me a picture!

Make Your Own Colony Island Costume

A Penelope costume should be easy enough to put together. All you would need is a woman’s business suit, a pair of sensible heels, a briefcase and maybe a couple of plastic starfish pinned to your suit. Bonus points for a  starfish lapel pin. If you have a mermaid costume you can actually walk in and not fall on your face, so much the better! Don’t forget your briefcase!

Guys, you get off easy on this one. Dress like an IT nerd wearing a pair of board shorts. If you want to be a bit more creative, how about Carl the Pizza Guy? All you do is grab an empty pizza box or two and dress like Zonker Harris in the Doonesbury comic strip. (Alternatively, dressing like a beach bum will do quite well) Don’t forget to use ‘Dude’ and ‘Man’ in your sentences.

Seriously, if you do decide to give this a go, please send me a picture. I’ll be hosting  the wee ghoulies, and ghosties and three-legged beasties, dressed as Peter Macpherson. I’ll put on my kilt and look nerdy. The last bit shouldn’t be hard to do.

For more information, see the Wikipaedia article on Samhain.

Hurricane Matthew

Hurricane MatthewIn the wake of Hurricane Matthew, early reports from Colony Island indicate damage was considerably less than expected. In an exclusive telephone interview with mayor, William Marlin, the overall assessment is Colony Island was very lucky.

“First of all, call me ‘Bill’. The only time I’m called ‘William’ is when Mrs. Marlin is upset with me.

“I’d say we dodged a real bullet this time around. We’ve been fairly lucky with storms in the past, but I was sure we were going to suffer a direct hit. Our location makes us kind of a sitting duck

“Don’t think that we didn’t have any damage. We did incur storm damage on the island but we’ve seen worse in the past. Our town has been here for well over two hundred years and we’re doing pretty good.”

Colony Island is Powerless

“We lost power early in the storm. I’ve had to call Florida Power and Light at least half a dozen times and I still don’t think they believe we’re an actual town.[1] Sometimes, they say they’ve never heard of us. Other times, they’ve told me to stop wasting their time with practical jokes in the middle of an emergency. The last time, they simply hung up on me.

“We do have some lines down and a number of damaged poles. Fortunately, a couple of residents here have worked for FPL at one time or another and they’ve advised us of the precautions we need to take.


The tiny community called Feraltown is completely deserted. The residents evacuated early on and headed for deep water. It is unknown if, or when, they’ll return.[2]

As for the rest of the population, mayor Marlin said “Over half of our citizens packed up and headed inland. For example, George Tench owns a condo up in the city and the whole family decided to ride things out, up there.

“A good many of our citizens don’t own cars and rely on bicycles to get around the island. By and large, they were the ones who remained here in town. We really need some sort of transportation system on the island, especially for times like this.

“I really must hand it to our Volunteer Fire Department. They remained on duty, every single one of them, and patrolled the town looking for folks in trouble and checking on houses. Now that the worst is over, they’ve been helping remove limbs and downed trees from the streets.”

Storm Damage

Bill Marlin was quick to sum up the damage. “Aside from trees and limbs down, the overall damage is fairly light. A couple of houses lost their roofs, screens were torn from many windows, some fences came down and a tree fell into somebody’s Florida room.

“All but two of the boats comprising our fishing fleet were able to put to sea and ride out the storm near Bermuda. The two remaining boats got knocked around a bit but they’ll be put to rights as soon as the boat yard reopens.

“The only real flooding came from the downpour. The storm surge was less than we had expected and that probably had something to do with the tides. Once we get the power back on, we’ll be in business, again.”

As of this moment, it is uncertain as to when the lights will come back on. Given that few people realise there is a town in Florida named Colony Island and even fewer actually know where it is, restoring power to the island may take a while. Meanwhile, the minimal damage and small storm surge will reinforce the belief among many of the residents that Poseidon has their back.


Thanks to Roxanne Leavitt and Dalton Smith for contributing to this story.

[1] On most maps, Colony Island is overlooked all together. It does appear on more detailed maps, but even then, it’s difficult to locate.

[2] ‘Feral’ is the local term for merfolk who constantly live at sea. From time to time, one or more will try and have a go at living on land. They are usually housed in the Feraltown community until they begin to assimilate. As a rule, feral merfolk have few – if any – possessions and will readily decamp at a moment’s notice. Once the emergency is over, returning is optional.

A blast from the past

Earlier today, Facebook popped up one of those ‘See Your Memories’ things on my timeline. Usually, I simply roll my eyes and move on.

Today, though, was different. This blast from the past originated in 2013. It announced that work was underway on Urban Mermaid. The announcement included a short story I’d written as part of a contest.

The short story is intended to be part of the third book in the Colony Island series. I have yet to come up with a name for this book.

Tails From Colony Island has picked up  a number of new followers recently who may not be aware of this story. It was originally published on It appeared on The Parsons Rant and then, finally, on Colony Island – Home of the Urban Mermaid.

So, if you’re interested in a quick mermaid story, take a look at Dear Mom . . . Those who have already read Urban Mermaid may recognise a few things from the novel.

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